Category: Publius

Publius Moves On

Prose, Publius

I always wondered what it would be like on my last day of work. I thought I would be sentimental. I didn’t think the feeling would be relief. There are many other things I didn’t think. I didn’t think that the fun bits of my career would be the early parts. I used to think …

Wherefore Art Thou

Prose, Publius

And the best comment of the week comes from the young lady, who calls the play I’m teaching “Roosevelt And Juliet”. She says, “Why do adults want us to admire them? I mean, he’s cute, so I can see doing him. But I’m not going to kill myself for his dumb ass. I mean, really—Off …

Memo (I Couldn’t Make This Up)

Prose, Publius

by Publius   Dear Colleagues, Please note that, for the rest of the academic year, if you need anything printed, you need to go to the men’s bathroom. As you know, our departmental printer broke. And, as you may also know, as a cost-cutting measure, the district fired all but one printer repair person. Which …

Professional Development

Prose, Publius

by Publius As a former acid freak, I’m trained to handle extraneous bullshit. My dead pet schnauzer humping my leg while he lights the fuse to a dynamite stick he’s crammed up his ass for example. Stuff like that. But today? No one is trained for today. We just went to an all day professional …

Lenny Gates or One Morning In The Life

By | Prose, Publius

There were three thousand six hundred and fifty-three days like this in his sentence. …The three extra days were for leap years. from One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn As I park my car this morning, I notice some guys working in the football field, and others carrying bricks to …

Today is Records Keeping Day

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

I just get back from Christmas Vacation and walk in, when I see Dr. Galvin running down the hall swinging a broom over his head. Literally. Running down the hall swinging a broom. Later I learn that a bat got in the school. Later. But since I didn’t see the bat — the bat was …

Professional Development

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

I asked Andrew how he felt after yesterday’s professional development. “It wasn’t epically soul crushing.” Andrew is a nice guy. This, it must be noted, was his idea of something good to say. That said, we spent the entire day at a faculty meeting pondering the following question. “How does the ability to read complex …

The Unfairness of Life

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

Best quote of the day from a high school kid: “I don’t know why she gave me an F. She got nothin’ to complain about. I never do nothin’ in that class.” _____