Category: Humor

The Meeting

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

I couldn’t come up with any actual reason why I shouldn’t go to the faculty meeting. I’m healthy, of sound mind, and have no pressing engagements. The only serious agenda, at least at my table, was why Mr. Gates has a bra hanging in a tree just outside his classroom’s window. It’s just out of …

On Rejection

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

I’ve got a bit of free time between classes, such as it is … Speaking of Publius, I think he’s a devout follower of Thomas Merton, who once said, “In this era, it is no longer necessary to parody. it’s sufficient to simply quote.” University of California Press just sent me a Class A Rejection. …

Be the Donkey

By | Humor, Michael Simms, Prose

Recently I heard someone say that when he stopped drinking, his life changed so quickly it was like being “rocketed into a new dimension”, and I remembered when I got sober a number of years ago, I had the same experience. During the first two years of sobriety, my health, my friendships, and my family …

2011 Autumn House Sentence of the Year Award

By | Eva-Maria Simms, Humor, Prose, Sentence of the Year Awards

submitted by Eva Simms “A Swedish moose that is believed to have become intoxicated from eating fermented apples was discovered entangled and hanging over the branches of a homeowner’s apple tree, oblivious to its fate.” from The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette _____

Meet this Walmart Greeter

By | Humor, John Samuel Tieman, Prose

Charley, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn’t seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their “Older Person Friendly” policies. One day the boss called him …

Poetry Reading at the Circus

By | Humor, John Samuel Tieman, Prose

It was really interesting being backstage, as it were, at a working circus. The gathering audience is getting ready to play. The circus folks are getting ready to go to work. It’s a bit tense, actually. It’s not play to them. The folks are warming up their acts, which means also warming up the animals, …

The Ultra Magic Classified Decoder Ring Secret Handshake News

By | Humor, Prose, Publius

So this morning, the assistant principal takes me aside like we’re plotting an overthrow of the government. She actually clears out a room of the library, locks the door behind us. She jokes about what folks might think, B.C.I., as my students would say, booty call implications for those of us of a certain age. …

The World of Ten Thousand Poems

By | Humor, Poetics, Prose, Susan Kelly-DeWitt

If you walked into my kitchen right now you’d see the cartoon I snipped from a December 2006 New Yorker posted on a cupboard door beside one of Snoopy typing away on the roof of his doghouse, and a photograph of our now not-so-new new president signing something into law. In the New Yorker cartoon …